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Lurking Musings

~ Musings of a newly published writer

Lurking Musings

Category Archives: Musings

Amwriting is back!

06 Saturday Oct 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings, Publicity

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

#amwriting, writing


Earlier, I mentioned that Amwriting, the writer’s blog site that I sometimes contribute to, had been on hiatus. Well, on the 1st of October it came back with a vengence!

So, you may now go direct to http://amwriting.org/ to view the home page of the site and see what lovely content the other contributors have been putting up there since the relaunch.

You may also go direct to this link:

http://amwritingblog.com/wordpress/?s=Lascelles&posttype=post&widget=advanced-search-widget-2

Which will take you to a rather nicely laid out page showcasing all my content on that site. That includes the infamous Mighty Red Pen of Justice article which scored so many hits recently…. Of course, while I am all in favour of you going to see what other writers are up to, I much prefer if you stay faithful to me and go direct to this page… 🙂

Fantasy Writing contest

30 Sunday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Fantasy Writing, Fantasy Writing Contest, productivity, Publication, reading period, traditional publishers, writing, writing contest


A hell of a long time ago, I sent off a short story that had been hanging about in my hard drive for a while to the fantasy writing contest. It was a tale of an elderly woman being mugged for a magical dagger she carried with her. It had previously been rejected by Sword and Sorcereress and Tor.com and I saw no harm is sending it off to be rejected by this contest too. I had more or less forgotten about it as the submission window numbered several months and the reading period many more (the reasons why are outlined in this blog by the editors).

Now a casual tweet by the editors has sent me into a panic. They have decided on a short list. However, instead of dealing with the cuts in a quiet and civilised manner, they are publishing the list of lucky people in small increments… One small selection of the list released each day until the entire list is out there. So now, of course, I am absolutely desperate to know if I have been successful despite not caring until now.

So well done to the editors of this contest for making me feel like this… I am off to sit in a corner gibbering until the entire list is released. 🙂

Good luck to all who entered and commisserations to those of you who, like me, don’t make it to the final cut.

The GQ of Downton Abbey

28 Friday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Film, Musings, TV

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Clash of the Titans, Doctor Who, Downton Abbey, Father Octavian, Game of Thrones, Geek Quotient, Hugh Bonneville, Iain Glen, Jessica Brown Findlay, Maggie Smith, Misfits, Penelope Wilton, Red Dwarf, Robert Bathurst, Ser Jorah Mormont, Shaun of the Dead


This is something I think may well become a regular feature of this blog, mainly because it seems to be something I do naturally whenever I watch something on TV. The basics are simple – take a non geek TV show or film and analyse the proportion of the cast who happen to have been involved in something else with geek credentials.

I have decided to name this concept the Geek Quotient. In fact, in the tradition of Mathematicians the world over, I would propose that it be dubbed the Lascelles Geek Quotient because my ego needs feeding. You can shorten it to LGQ if you like, or even GQ but with that option you risk both being confused with a popular fashion magazine and being glowered at by my ego.

The equation is rather simple:

Divide the number of actors in the cast who have been in geeky related shows by the total number of cast members.

So, why have I chosen Downton Abbey for the debut of this exciting new concept in geek mathematics? Well, I am of the opinion that this show will likely score high based on a rather cursory glance at the cast list.

For those who don’t know, Downton Abbey is an ITV period drama set in Yorkshire in a period (currently) between the sinking of the Titanic and the advent of the 1920s. It follows the inhabitants of the eponynmous stately home, both the noble family that owns it and their many servants, as they live through such horrific historical events as the first world war and the appearance of the telephone. As is normal for such period dramas, the cast is replete with quality British actors of the type who also often get roles in sci fi and fantasy both in the UK and Hollywood. Some are even rather better known for their geek roles than their involvement in this show…

Maggie Smith as Thetis in Clash of the Titans

Now, my calculation of Downton’s GQ is 0.633 based on examining the 49 cast members listed on ImdB and determining that 31 of them have a link to some geek TV show or film. This is assuming that ‘Geek TV show or film’ is defined as something with overt supernatural or science fiction elements. Pirates of the Carribean counts, for example, whereas Hornblower (which many of the cast do have roles in too) does not. This is not a surprising result given that the cast includes Maggie Smith (with credits as far back as the original Clash of Titans films and, of course, her recent geek cred from the Harry Potter films), Iain Glen (who is notable as Ser Jorah Mormont in Game of Thrones as well as Father Octavian in Doctor Who) and Penelope Wilton (excellent as Prime Minister Harriet Jones  in Doctor Who, not to mention Shaun’s mum in Shaun of the Dead) but also has

The beard makes him completely unrecognisable…

a number of people who have done one off guest appearances on various shows. For example, Jessica Brown Findlay, who plays the youngest daughter, was in one episode of Misfits and Hugh Bonneville, who plays Earl Grantham, was almost unrecognisable behind a massive beard as a pirate in a recent episode of Doctor Who. Out of all of these, many of which I spotted without recourse to the internet, one truly took me by surprise. For much of the series, I looked at the actor who played Sir Anthony Strallen (Robert Bathurst) and tried to work out where I had seen him before. Turns out he actually played the role of Todhunter in Red Dwarf as well as Prince Henry in the original series of Blackadder…

Todhunter

Sir Anthony Strallen

So, there you have it. Do you think I have the calculation of this correct? Do you know of any other films or TV shows which might beat this score? Feel free to comment below…

[Book Review] Lady of Devices

26 Wednesday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 2 Comments


Over on epublishabook, I review the steampunk novel, Lady of Devices by Shelley Adina…

http://www.epublishabook.com/2012/09/25/book-review-lady-of-devices-by-shelley-adina/

Pop over there and see what I thought of it and feel free to comment either there or here if you agree or disagree with my opinions…

Reposted: The Mighty Red Pen of Justice

25 Tuesday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

#amwriting, books, editors, guest blogging, guest posts, letter of acceptance, literacy in primary schools, new experiences, random insanity, reviews, sign contract, writing


Ok, here is a copy-paste of my article from the Amwriting blog on editors and the love-hate relationship we have with them. Warning: It may contain incoherence and random insanity.

Inevitably, the nature of my blogging at the moment will revolve around new experiences. There is also likely to be a certain element of comparison of the writing life to that of a teacher. This entry is no exception….

Your friendly neighbourhood editorial team

Near the end of August (the 21st to be precise) my first novella, Transitions, is due for release. Up until now, my publishing record has been somewhat thin –a single short story in an anthology – but this release makes things a little more ‘official’. With the short story, the process was relatively simple – submit story, get letter of acceptance, get contract, sign contract and then wait for the process of publication to take place. I reviewed some proofs at one point and got sent the cover to go ‘oooh’ over but apart from that I had little involvement.

With Transitions it was a whole different ball game. With Transitions I had to deal with the most feared creature ever to walk the hallowed halls of any publisher… The Editor.

Writers have a love-hate relationship with their editors. On the one hand, the fact you have been assigned one at all means the work you have submitted meets that publisher’s standards, i.e. you are good enough to be published. They would not bother if your work was unmitigated tripe, you’d have been booted out the rejection door as soon as they looked at you (and, in fact, even a work that is up to the standard may get this treatment too…). On the other hand, you hate your editor because they are the person who criticises your work minutely, pulling at all the little flaws in your writing style and, possibly more horrifically, imposing upon you the dreaded changes that the publisher feels are needed. Now, don’t deny it…. I can see through your protestations that you co-operate with your editor and don’t mind the changes. Come on, admit it. Deep down, maybe hidden where no one but you knows it is there, you have that little ball of resentment. That little voice which says ‘but this is my baby, I worked hard at this, you can’t be so brutal to it you mean old person you!’ To paraphrase Pratchett, handing your work over to an editor is sometimes like bringing up a cute little pony, nurturing it, loving it, making it one of your family and then handing it over to a new owner and watching them ride off on it using spurs and a whip.

A renowned editor demonstrates the essential skills required at a recent editing conference.

I like to think I was lucky with my editor because I knew her before she was assigned. Well, I’d reviewed one of her books on epublish a book and she’d emailed me to thank me. So I knew that she knew what she was on about and we had a rapport already and that is always a good start.  I wasn’t too concerned when the file with her comments in it dropped into my inbox. Except that I had forgotten one thing…

You see, I actually wrote Transitions more than 5 years ago. Since then I have changed significantly as a writer, worked hard to lose some terrible bad habits and one thing my editor showed me was exactly how far I had improved. There were significant errors – point of view shifts, tense shifts, purple prose, repeated words… the list went on. Thing is, new improved writer me agreed emphatically with every single change because I knew that had I read them in a book I was reviewing or editing I would be scathing. However, at the back of my mind, naive young writer me was still there going ‘NO!!!!!!!! You cannot mess with a masterpiece of this quality you insane bitch!!!!!! All the quirks are there for perfectly respectable and reasonable reasons!!!!* Aieeeeeeeee!!!! I kill you!!!!!’**

Luckily, new improved writer me got together with sensible me and beat the living poop out of naive young writer me before any of those sentiments could express themselves in e-mails to the editor. I made the changes*** and was happy to do it because, frankly, you do what your editor says and then thank them for doing it. Reading over the completed work, I am glad that I did because the work is improved overall and has a definite professional sheen.

So, what has that got to do with teaching? I did say I would try to shoehorn that in somehow. Well, here’s a thing. Schools, especially primary schools where the fundamentals of the skill we call writing are first picked up, aren’t actually all that big on editing. They work hard on writing skills – grammar, spelling, punctuation, structure, all that malarkey but once a pupil hands in a completed piece of work at the end of the lesson that is it. They get it marked and returned with some comments but they do not get the chance to act on those comments save by not making the same mistakes in a future piece of work. Whatever mark they get for that work is what gets recorded. So, for pupils in schools there is a lot of pressure to get it right first time and no real experience of the subtle give and take of discussion between a writer and editor where perfection is attempted by a consensual process. The process of editing Transitions underwent consisted of several rounds, each one coming closer to the editor’s ideal. The pieces of work I have marked in my time teaching will never achieve that because they are forever locked in an exercise book, stuck in the same form they were when handed in with only my comments hinting at their potential. I do wonder if schools are not missing out on an important lesson in literacy – the importance of critical review and editing on achieving perfection in writing. Not getting it right first time is not a failure, just a single step along the path to your goal. Those who doubt the importance of editors should maybe take a look at some of the original first draft manuscripts by famous authors****. They can be very revealing about the changes most novels go through to get published. So, in conclusion, respect your editor and make sure you listen to what they say and when they spank your arse with a massive sheaf of notes pointing out all your shortcomings, be sure to say ‘Thank you, Ma’am, please may I have another’. It’s for your own good, after all.

*They weren’t, they really weren’t. They were the literary equivalent to masturbation – showy and flashy and not actually achieving much other than self gratification.

**Naive young writer me was always one for over use of alliteration. And overuse of exclamation marks. Not to mention extreme arrogance. Most of these traits have been firmly beaten out of my now.

*** Yes, even the one I struggled with because I had English characters in England using an English colloquialism that needed to be removed because Americans would have problems understanding it… That one *hurt*

**** Like the Photograph of the first page of the first draft manuscript of Lord of the Rings which can be seen inside one of Tolkien’s biographies (can’t remember which one, it was many years ago I saw it). It is hardly a clean and well structured piece of literature. Seeing that as a child gave me insight into how even a great writer often starts out with something that needs a lot of polishing before it is publishable.

Exciting new changes and a gratuitous dog photo

25 Tuesday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

#amwriting, blogging, dog photos, gratuitous dog photo, guest blogging, guest posts, productivity, websitte changes, writing


As some of you regular readers out there may already be aware, my rantings occasionally manage to escape out into the world via other blogsites. One of the sites I have been a regular contributor to in the past year or so has been the Amwriting.org website.

Gratuitous Dog Photo

Given that it seems a link on this blog to a post I did on Amwriting in August has only just appeared on some people’s RSS feeds (odd situation, I have no idea why that has happened…) I think I need to break some news in order to explain what is occuring because if you click the link to the ‘Mighty Red Pen of Justice’ article you will currently get a dead link.

Amwriting.org is currently on hiatus pending a pheonix like rebirth on the 1st of October, 2012. Today I have been sent various links and information to prepare me for this date when the site will reopen with some changes to how things are managed but essentially, as far as I can tell, still the same site. The archives, including all my old posts, will still be available on there. Currently, they are locked down so only a few of the bloggers from the old site like myself can access them but once the site goes live they will be made available to all and sundry.

I do not at present know if the links provided in my blog here will still work to link you to these archives or if you will need a new link. I will find that out when it goes live and will post new links if appropriate.

If anyone is really desperate to read The Mighty Red Pen of Justice, I suppose I can post a copy of it here for you to read. Look out for that later today if I can manage it.

In the meantime, enjoy the gratuitous dog picture provided above…

Free book!

16 Sunday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings, Publicity

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Amazon, BBW Romance writers, Blog Anniversary, blue moons, books, Jen Thompson, Judy Bagshaw, Julie Schriver, M.S Fowle, paranormal romance, Paranormal Romance Anthology, Publication, Shades of Love, Skyla Dawn Cameron, The Curse, Transitions, virtual shelves


This coming week sees a very special occasion in literature, an occasion that occurs once in every 10 blue moons (often referred to as a decabluemoon) and an event that is celebrated the world over by people in all walks of life*…

Yes, that is right, it is the first anniversary of the start of this blog on the 18th of September.

Almost one year ago (on the 18th September, 2011), I finally bowed to overwhelming pressure from my own ego to make my innermost thoughts public. It is also almost a year ago that my first publication hit the virtual shelves. With my second publication now out there in the world, it seems a good time to do a freebie giveaway.

So, now you can claim your absolutely free copy of The Curse. Just click this link!

What is The Curse, I hear you ask? Well, that is a very good question. When the BBW Romance Writers were getting together to write the Paranormal Romance Anthology that became known as Shades of Love and which Transitions is a part, we also decided to do what is known as a Round Robin story. This is a story where a group of writers collaborate on it. We decided on a broad story idea (a woman cursed with the gift of prophesy) then each of us took turns to write a section each, leaving the next person with a situation to resolve. This was done until we reached the natural climax. Then Judy Bagshaw and myself did a final polish on the story to make it publishable and were forced to learn more than we really wanted to learn about Creative Commons licenses.

The whole was topped off with a rather wonderful cover*** (pictured) created by the excellent M.S Fowle who deserves a lot of kudos for her efforts at making our writing look like a ‘proper book’. If you ever have a book you need a cover for, I would definitely suggest you consider talking to her about it.

So, that was how it came to pass that we happened to have a free ebook available to give to you all. Go on, click that link and download the Zip file that contains versions of this book for many different ebook formats. Then try to guess which of the authors wrote which of the bits….

* Well, Ok, it occurs once a year and is probably celebrated by very few people and not the world over** but don’t tell my ego that, please, it does enjoy its little illusions and gets stroppy when it is thwarted.

** Though I do have a special shout out to those of you in Panama, Peurto Rico and the Ukraine who seem very interested in what I am saying here *waves*

*** Actually, she made us three covers, that is how dedicated she is. If I can get permission from her, I will post the other two covers for you to look at ‘what could have been’.

[AW Blog chain post] Seven

11 Tuesday Sep 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 16 Comments

Tags

Absolute Write, Colossus, Egypt, Greece, Mausoleum at Helicarnassus, pharos of alexandria, Photography, Rhodes, Seven, Seven Wonders, Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, The Colossus of Rhodes, The Great Pyramid of Giza, The Hanging Gardens of Babylon, The Lighthouse of Alexandria, the Statue of Zeus at Olympia, the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus, Turkey


The number seven has a lot connected to it: Virtues, Sins, Samurai, Sages (in both Greece and China), Dwarves and Brides (with an equal number of brothers to accompany them). There were also seven Kings of Rome and equally seven emperors not to mention Shakespeare’s ages of man, Gaiman’s Endless, Tolkien’s Valar (and stones and stars and Dwarf kings, but only one White tree) and Martin’s Kingdoms of Westeros… At one point there were also seven Doctors in Doctor Who but recently they seem to have acquired some more from somewhere. We could also talk about Seven of Nine, Blakes Seven or the fact that 7 inches is the diameter of a 45rpm gramaphone record…

One of the Seven Sages of Greece – Cleobulus of Lindos, one time Tyrant of Lindos

But what I want to talk about is none of these. I actually want to talk about one thing I have missed from that list above…

Yeah, ok, I have missed a lot from that list because 7 is a very common number in a lot of things. However, I missed one thing that is obvious and probably should not require you to check the same wikipedia page I have been looking at to know about it. What I want to talk about are the seven wonders of the ancient world.

I’ve always been fascinated by these, ever since hearing about them at primary school. Things so grand and over the top that their reputations have lasted thousands of years. Of course, I am sure you all know the names of the seven ancient wonders, but just in case here is the list:

The Great Pyramid at Giza, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus, the Statue of Zeus at Olympia, the Mausoleum at Helicarnassus, the Colossus of Rhodes and the Lighthouse (or Pharos) of Alexandria.

It is interesting to note that two of them are graves (the pyramid and the mausoleum), two of them are examples of great feats of engineering for the time (the Hanging Gardens and the Lighthouse) and another two are of religious significance (the temple of Artemis and the Statue of Zeus). The odd one out is the Colossus of Rhodes which is a statue of a Titan which might therefore be considered ‘religious’ but is a bit of a weird one and could also probably count as a ‘feat of engineering’* You could therefore argue that the wonders were indicative of the interests of the cultures in those periods.

In my life, I have visited the sites of three of these monuments. I went to the outskirts of Cairo to visit the Pyramids on my Honeymoon and while I did not go into the Great Pyramid itself because of the massive queues, I did see it and went into one of the lesser ones. Quite a humbling and frightening experience – small, cramped tunnels, the ever present sensation of all those tonnes of rock above and around you. Even if you are not claustrophobic you begin to get a feel for what it is like to be claustrophobic. If you are claustrophobic, I suggest you think more than twice before going in. I also visited the island of Rhodes a few years back and saw the pillars on the mouth of the harbour of Rhodes Old Town which are supposed to indicate where the two legs of the Colossus were as they stradded the bay. I have also been to Turkey and wandered around the ruins of Ephesus, including the Temple of Artemis that was there.

One of the two monuments on Rhodes harbour indicating the possible positions of the feet of the colossus.

Of the four I have not visited, at least one is probably not accessible at this time, being in the middle of what was until recently a warzone, and may well have been a legend rather than something that actually existed**. Of the remaining three, I have seen some of the statues that were purported to come from the Mausoleum in the British Museum and there are fragments of the temple of Zeus in the Louvre, which I have also visited though apparently nothing remains of the statue which was the true Wonder***. Finally, the site of lighthouse, the island off Alexandria known as the Pharos, is still there though the lighthouse itself was finally destroyed by an earthquake in the 15th century. Maybe one day I will manage to visit the sites of these. You could argue that it is a shame that these great feats of architecture were allowed to fall into ruin. However, you could also say that it is a testement to the skills of those builders that even fragments of some of them still exist today never mind almost complete structures of one of them.

*Of course, they are all feats of engineering because of their sheer scale…. but the Pharos and Hanging Gardens are examples of someone applying a scientific principle – the use of light in navigation and the use of irrigation to turn a desert into a garden – to a practical use.

** If they didn’t, then the walls of Babylon almost certainly did and apparently also qualify for Wonder status

*** There are varying stories about the fate of the statue. Some claim Caligula ordered it beheaded and replaced with his own head, others that it was lost in a fire either at the temple itself (in 425AD) or in Constantinople in 475AD.

Yes, this is a blogchain post and that means consequences if you do not follow through and read all the other entries in the chain. This month’s comedy punishment is to be buried under 200 tonnes of masonry in a desert somewhere. So that is something for you all to look forward to enjoying…

Participants and posts:
orion_mk3 – http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month’s post)
Ralph Pines – http://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
bmadsen – http://hospitaloflife.wordpress.com (link to this month’s post)
writingismypassion – http://charityfaye.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s
post)

pyrosama – http://matrix-hole.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
areteus – https://lurkingmusings.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
randi.lee – http://emotionalnovel.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
BBBurke – http://www.awritersprogression.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
BigWords – http://bigwords88.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
meowzbark – http://erlessard.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
SuzanneSeese – http://www.viewofsue.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
AFord – http://writeword.blog.com/ (link to this month’s
post)
Kricket – http://kricketwrites.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s
post)

The Dystopia in American politics

28 Tuesday Aug 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

2012 US Election, Akin, attwood, current-events, dystopias, gender war, margeret, politics, Republican party, todd akin


I had promised myself that I would not comment on the current US election. Mainly because I am not an expert on politics, not least an expert in a foreign nation’s politics, and because, as someone who is not eligible to vote in the US elections*, I really do not see it as my place to comment.

However, the recent gaff made by Todd Akin and numerous other stories about the beliefs of Republican candidates and supporters made me wonder what is was that the Republican party was actually trying to achieve. It also made me worry that opinions and policies expressed over in the US often have a habit of travelling across the pond and influencing our politicians here…

Thing is, I have a feeling that these politicians are getting something seriously wrong. I think they are operating under a massive misconception which I feel someone should point out them.

The purpose fo science fiction dystopias are to scare us into not doing the things that led to the dystopia. They should not be seen as a manifesto for how you would like to see your country run.

Take The Handmaid’s Tale by Margeret Attwood. Now, I am not aware of her actual opinions on politics or the dynamics of the ‘gender war’** but I am fairly certain that when she sat down to write this stark and frightening vision of a world where women are treated like cattle she did not do so with the intention of drafting Republican party policy. I am sure her intention was something linked to perhaps warning us about the speed at which freedoms could be eroded by an unscrupulous government or the horror inherent in treating other human beings like objects. It’s a warning both to those who might be targetted by such policies and also to those who might implement them in the hope that both can work to avoid such a consequence.

Yet, by expressing such opinions as Akin has, about how there is a concept such as ‘legitimate rape’, or talking about bans on abortion and contraception, these politicians are indeed following the path which could lead to Attwood’s vision becoming a reality. Any policy or belief which implies that women are incapable of looking after their own bodies or making their own decisions should not be considered.

Ok, Akin was not, apparently, expressing the party line in this issue. Fair enough. But what he has said in my opinion represents an underlying current in the party which is certainly present. Offical policy or not, there are enough Republicans who believe this sort of nonsense and there are states in the US where it is currently illegal for a woman to get an abortion or for doctors to use certain treatments on a woman on the offchance she may be pregnant.

It leads me to wonder exactly what the purpose of government actually is. In my personal opinion I would say that it was there to make lives easier for the populace of a country, to organise things that we need such as transport and water and food and make sure that these things are clean and fairly administered. Crime prevention and the establishment of laws to promote civil order is another role they are needed for. They also allow us to pool resources in the form of taxes to make better use of said resources. Because, hey, while no one likes to pay tax, you have to admit a simple cut of your income is far better than having to fork out a hell of a lot more to pay indiviually for all the little things that governments do for you. I would even, grudgingly, admit that a government’s role may also be to defend a nation against attack though I would also say that it should not be their role to attack other nations in the name of said defence.

All these things and more I would say are the responsibility of a good government and maybe I am too much of an idealist to consider such things as being part of what modern governments do since the evidence seems to prove me wrong in many cases.

However, I would not say that the role of a government extends to imposing control over an individual’s body when that body has committed no crime other than to be born with a particular set of genes. To then hide such blatant prejudice against what amounts to 50% of the voting public behind some religious based excuses which have as much to do with faith and belief in God as their policies have with the true nature of politics smacks of cowardice.

If I were in the Republican party leadership now, I would be seeking through my membership roll for someone, anyone, who was moderate and liberal and intelligent enough to speak out about the current political issues without being sexist or homophobic. I’d then put them forward and get them to answer all questions about my policy and hope to hell none of the dinosaurs manage to outshout him or her. Only then, once this mythical and possibly non-existent Republican has got a few decent soundbites into the media, I might consider that there was a chance they might win the election. Any election. Because, frankly, from where I am sitting, you aren’t looking all that good at the moment and I will be very surprised if anyone who is female, gay or half way intelligent votes for you…

*It is a terrible oversight. Really, a person as important and intelligent as me should be automatically allowed to vote in any election I fancy so that I may share my wisdom and insights with the entire world. However, current world leaders do not seem to understand this point of view, despite my repeated letters to them explaining the situation to them. Ignorant gits could have least replied…

** Though I can guess based on her writing I would not like to presume…

Fire and Ice [AW Blog Chain for August]

08 Wednesday Aug 2012

Posted by D.A Lascelles in Musings

≈ 21 Comments

Tags

Absolute Write, AW Blog Chain, flaming eye, Mordor, Olympic flame, Olympics, psychology, religious symbology, Sauron, storms, symbols, The Shire


I have to admit that this title had me stumped. I really could not think of anything to comment upon that had happened in the world or had to do with the craft of writing which involved the concepts of fire and ice… I spent a while pondering possibilites – talking about opposites, for example, and how plots in stories often need these to create tension. However, nothing I could think of really inspired me. I mean, what has been happening in the UK recently that has involved a large flame?

Oh yeah…

Danny Boyle performed a massive ritual a week and a half ago which, according to many of my friends, transformed The Shire into Mordor and raised a massive, flaming eye above the stadium so that Sauron could get a good view of the Olympics.

How the hell could I have missed that?

Luckily, this massive ritual seems to have been successful. Not only did Sauron get his premium seat in the stadium but he seems to have blessed team GB with success. Because, suddenly, as if by magic, we are apparently good at Olympic sports*. That is some serious mojo there because, for as long as I can remember, we have always been rather middling at all sports. Plus, it cannot be denied that the Olympics, including the rather exciting wins we have had, have been a great boost to morale in the UK.

Personally, I there think that whatever sacrifice Grand Magistar of the Great Ritual, Danny Boyle, made to the Dark Lord Sauron to achieve this was definitely worth it.**

So, yes, the Olympic flame. It is actually a very powerful symbol supposed to commemorate the theft of fire from the gods by Prometheus (possibly the first theft in the same way as Cain performed the first homicide…) and is also an example (possibly the only existing modern example?) of what is known in religious/spiritual terms as an eternal flame (feel free to insert an appropriate joke about The Bangles here…). That is, a flame which is kept constantly tended and, rather than being put out and relit is passed on from vessel to vessel.

In fact, the modern Olympic flame is lit on Mount Olympus by eleven women representing Vestal Virgins using the light of the sun and is transferred to the new host country using torches lit from that original flame in one hell of a long relay race (which did pass very close to my house at one point, I think they got lost on the way as we are a few hundred miles north of the direct route between Athens and London).  There is a hell of a lot of symbolism inherent in that set up, not least the ideas of continuity and eternity. My point? Well, I joked that Danny Boyle was performing a massive magical ritual as part of his opening ceremony but in reality he actually was. The whole Olympics, from the opening ceremony to the closing ceremony, is packed with magical and religious symbols and whether you believe in gods, magic or whatever or not these symbols still have an affect on the human psyche. Psychologically, we have been programmed over our entire evolution to put significance on these things and respond to them with the appropriate level of awe. Fire is one of the strongest of these – Olympic flames, burning bushes, burnt offerings, all have been instrumental in our beliefs throughout history.

The scars in the path here were caused by flood damage. Photo taken on Monday 6th August 2012 at Drinkwater Park, Prestwich

What about Ice? Ah, you thought I had forgotten about ice…. Well, no, I hadn’t and my Olympic theme holds true. No, I am not talking about the Winter Olympics (which does seem to get forgotten in this country, not really been talked about much since the days of Torville and Dean and Eddie ‘the Eagle’ Edwards) but about the strange thing that happened the day after what has been described as our greatest Olympic day (Saturday 4th August, when we won oh so many medals). A massive storm raged over Manchester causing massive flooding in my local area. Now, summer storms are not unusual and flooding has been known to happen on occasion. However, the really freaky thing about this storm was that it hailed. Yes, hail. Lumps of ice fell from the sky in August on a day that had been very warm. Now, I am no expert on the weather but I think I am right in thinking that this was a somewhat unusual occurence. Clearly, whatever Boyle did had side effects which affected the weather… Maybe the powerful symbol of fire needed the equally powerful ice to balance it amd restore equilibrium to the universe?

So, there you have it… Fire and Ice, important psychological symbols which still impact us in the supposedly more secular and less superstitious modern age. Whether you are writing fantasy, horror, science fiction or even a simple contemporary romance you can use such concepts to induce potent emotions in your readers. Just as the Olympic flame has induced a great passion for sport among people who would not normally care.

* Yeah, ok, we were good at Beijing too but this year we are better… Of course, despite actually being third in the medals table behind the USA and China, according to the British media we are still apparently ‘winning’ the Olympics…

** Ok, yeah, I do not deny that all our athletes are incredibly talented and have worked hard at their sport. But we seem to suffer from bad luck a lot… missing out on gold by mere inches. This year, that bad luck has evaporated and it is about damn time it did.

Ok, Blog chains… this is how it works. You ‘ve read this one so now you are legally bound to read all the others. There is a special server in the MI5 building set aside *just* for tracking who reads what on this blog chain so they *will* find you out… If you fail in this task, the IOC will have to take all the gold medals away from whichever country you are from so the honour of your country depends on this! The list of participants is below….

Participants and posts:
orion_mk3 – http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month’s post)
Ralph Pines – http://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
areteus – https://lurkingmusings.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Catherine Hall – http://theelephantinthetemple.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
bmadsen – http://www.bernardmadsen.com/ (link to this month’s post)
pyrosama – http://matrix-hole.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
magicmint – http://www.loneswing.com/ (link to this month’s post)
meowzbark – http://erlessard.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
tomspy77 – http://thomaswillamspychalski.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)
BBBurke – http://www.awritersprogression.com/ (link to this month’s post)
writingismypassion – http://charityfaye.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
Proach – http://desstories.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
randi.lee – http://emotionalnovel.blogspot.com/ (link to this month’s post)
BigWords -http://bigwords88.wordpress.com/ (link to this month’s post)

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